Winter in New York can seem endless. Frankly, that’s fine with me. I hate the summer—it’s hot, it smells and the streets are crowded. In winter, it’s cold, empty of crowds (except the holiday shoppers) and familiar. Were it my choice, the city would be locked in an endless winter. Endless winters were the specialty of C.S. Lewis’ White Witch from The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe. In her bid for control of Narnia, the parallel world beyond the doors of an enchanted wardrobe, she kept it a constant state of frostiness. The book, which everybody should read and re-read, is the story for the battle of Narnia’s freedom from winter.
1. Have Some More Turkish Delight
Cape by Valentino, fur by Lanvin, dress by Elie Saab, shoes by Carven
2. 2 Sons of Adam? 2 Daugthers of Eve?
Dress by Alexander McQueen, fur by Marni, shoes by Meadham Kirchoff
3. I Said, Brrrr it’s Cold in Here
Cape by Valentino, dress and shoes by Acne
Hey, that rhymes. Ever read Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Events? Well, Violet is one of the main characters and along with her brother and infant sister, she deals with, well, a lot of unfortunate events. There are leeches, evil troupes of actors, devilish counts and friendly deadly vipers. Yeah, it’s pretty much like working at a fashionable fashion magazine of fashions (badumpshhhhh, kidding). Violet’s main claim to fame is that she is an inventor and can quickly solve problems. Anyway, she’s got a Wednesday Addams meets Elizabeth Bennet vibe, which is cool—and spot on for the fall collections.
1. Well, this is a fucking unfortunate event we’re in.
Dress & tights by Marc Jacobs, coat by Marni, shoes by Lanvin
2. I can invent ANYTHING
Coat by Prabal Gurung, shirt by Tory Burch, pants by Proenza Schouler, boots by Gucci
3. I don’t want to be a child bride of Count Olaf
Coat by Rachel Comey, dress by Stella McCartney, shoes by Burberry Prorsum
Oh, she’s one nasty bitch that Mrs. Reed. As you’ll recall from your high school lit classes, Jane Eyre was Mrs. Reed’s niece and Mr. Reed charged his wife with raising her after his death. Being the god-fearing woman she was, Mrs. Reed obliged. She and her three children tormented poor Jane—throwing books at her, locking her in supposed haunted rooms and basically ruining her life. Eventually Mrs. Reed sent Jane to the Lowood school for some more torture with a religious twist. She was the HBIC of Gateshead and she sucks. When Jane grew older, they made some kind of peace…even after Mrs. Reed told Jane’s only family that she was dead. Good lord.
1. Um, Jane, I hate you.
Coat by Dries Van Noten, dress by Donna Karan, shoes by Bottega Veneta
2. Children, I hate Jane.
Dress by Chloe, coat by Celine, shoes by Fendi
3. I’m on an all carb diet, god Karen you are so stupid.
Coat by Marni, pants by Gucci, shoes by Salvatore Ferragamo