I’ve posted Eloise once before but she’s a fun character so let’s revisit, shall we? She’s perhaps the most uptown of uptown girls having grown up at the Plaza Hotel and we all know what happens to uptown girls when they grow up—they shop like fiends. Without fail, every time I take a spin uptown to Barney’s, Bergdorfs or Saks, they’re out in full force decked in finery and weighed down by Amex Black cards. Now, that doesn’t make them bad people, actually most of them are quite friendly but you know Eloise would be quite similar. So here you go, Eloise, the uptown girl all grown up.
1. Tea at the Palm Court
Dress by Burberry Prorsum, cape by Karen Walker, shoes by Miu Miu
2. Some fancy Cotillion
Dress by Oscar de la Renta, shoes by Miu Miu (What? I like Miu Miu.)
3. Hitting up The Trifecta-Barneys, Bergdorfs and Saks
Folk tales and Fairy tales aren’t what they used to be, I suppose we have Disney to thank for that. The original stories, as I’ve said time and time again, are for more entertaining. One of my favorites is the tale of Bluebeard. Bluebeard was an enormously wealthy man feared for his ugliness and blue beard and because his wives seemed to all mysteriously disappear. Intent on marrying again, he visited a neighbor to petition for one of their daughters to be his bride. The girls desist but after the younger sister agrees to attend an impressive banquet at his home, she marries him. Shortly after they’re married, Bluebeard leaves the castle on business (or something) and gives his new bride all the keys and instructs her to spend as she wishes, entertain as she likes and generally have a good time. Before heading out he tells her not to unlock a room in the dungeon with a certain key. Naturally, the girl can’t resist and with her sister is horrified to find the bloodied corpses of his former wives in the room. She drops the key in a pool of blood and in an oh-so-macbeth fashion, the stain will not come off the key. HORROR! HOMEGIRL IS GONNA GET TROLLED. When her husband suddenly returns and finds the tell tale key, he threatens to behead for her insolence but she bargains for time to pray before her death. The sisters lock themselves in the highest room of the tallest tower (as per usual) in an attempt to escape. Sidenote: what is it about the tallest tower that screams “freedom?” Moving on, just before Bluebeard murders the pair, their brothers come in and rescue them in heroic style and then they all live off Bluebeard’s money. So, the moral of the story is—don’t trust people with beards. Thanks, here’s the younger sister, bye.
1. Psh, I don’t wanna marry that guy…
Coat by Tsumori Chisato, shoes by Miu Miu
2. But, he put on a nice spread so I’ll just marry him
Dress by Temperley London, shoes by Alexander McQueen
3. This party seems like a perfect time to find a torture chamber